I have now been home for a grand total of five days and I can already tell everything is different. Sure, I'm in the same house with the same room, same friends, same possessions, same everything, and yet so different. It's feels as if this isn't my life anymore; it has become a life that someone else lives and I'm only visiting. It feels as if in Lewiston I'm supposed to be an adult. You know, grow up, work, and be more mature. In Boise it felt more like I was able to still be immature in a more mature way. Oxymoron right? Well, it's like this. In Boise I didn't have a job other than school and I when I wasn't in class or doing homework I was out with my friends; I didn't have to wait for them to get out of school or be home at a certain time because "it's a school night." Nobody asked questions about why we wanted burgers at midnight or felt the need to go to Winco and buy sour gummie worms or milk and oreos. Here, there are always questions to ask. Parents have to know where we're going, who's going, and what time we're coming back. Don't get me wrong, I love being home with everyone, but it just feels so different now.
I was talking to some friends not too long ago and it occurred to me that I'm basically homeless. I'm not homeless in the sense that I live by the river and only have a trash bag full of holes that contains only a few possessions; homeless in the sense that I belong neither here nor there. I don't have a permanent place to live in Boise, but I no longer live in Lewiston. It's a rather odd feeling that I do not enjoy. But, like everything else in life, it too shall pass. I guess I'm just truly realizing that life is definitely not going to be what it was in high school. Life goes on, and I just need to start going with it.
